Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Adoption....Plan A or B??

Twelve years ago I sat across the table on a first date with my now husband.  We talked about our dreams, future plans, and adoption.  We both felt like God wanted us to eventually adopt.  We didn’t know exactly what that meant at the time but we knew that wherever God took us in our future relationship, with or without each other, adopting would be a part of that.  Little did we know that six years later (after a hard year of waiting) that first date chatter would become a reality for us as a couple. 
 Daddy and Kyler
 Mommy and Kyler
As I fell in love with the thought of adoption it was definitely my plan B.  I, like many others, planned to have children first through birth and then adopt.   As people first approach adoption, they come considering adoption as God’s plan B. It seems only natural to want to have children through birth. Giving birth is natural, designed by God with the whole process coming out of a loving relationship with your spouse. Adoption seems foreign, awkward, and filled with unknowns; hardly natural.  In other words...plan B.

                Most women long to be mothers.  They want to experience the joy that it has to offer.  What they don’t realize is the journey to that joy can be so difficult.  Many people adopt for a wide variety of reasons but regardless it is God’s plan A for their life.  This may not make sense to us, because God's plan A is only fully known to Him.  His plan A is a world that allows sin, suffering, and hardship. His plan A works through pain to accomplish His will in us and in the world.  If we believe in God’s plan, then orphans are not an accident. And our problems in having children are not accidental either. They are the super hard things, the difficult events that God will turn for good as we seek and follow Him. 

                Whether you are blessed with a child by birth or a child by adoption, knowing that God has placed him or her with you enables a child to know that your choice to parent a child was part of God’s plan. On the other hand, if it is made clear that adoption was your plan B, then you will communicate that there was a better plan, but it failed. You will leave room for doubt about your adopted daughter or son's true place in life and in your family.

                Adoption is God's perfect plan for transforming orphans into sons and daughters.  Adoption is God’s plan A.  Seven years and two beautiful children later I know that this is true.  Regardless of how God brought me to the place of adoption, it was always in His plans.  He knew my plan A and led me on a journey that only He could have orchestrated.  And for that…I am thankful. 

My plan A...



  1. Couldn't have said it better myself!

  2. Yep! My thoughts exactly! LOVE this!! Love you too! :)

  3. I identify with every word. Thanks for sharing your heart and resonating with mine.